How to Define Success...on Your Terms

Years ago, a company director asked the project team I was on the following question - "what is the criteria of success for this project?" After a long and quite uncomfortable pause in the room, the director asked a clarifying question - "So what I'm asking is how do we know the project is a success?" That follow up question was also met with deafening silence. Finally the director asked "so team, if we don't know what would constitute the project as a success, then when would ever know that the project is successful?”. Although his project related questions were being directed towards the entire team, I could help but feel he was looking right at me and asking me about my life at that point. "What was the criteria of success for my life?" and if I did not know, then how could I ever say that I was successful?

Success is a word that can carry different meanings for different people. But the question you should ask yourself is what does success mean to YOU? Without answering that question for yourself, it's easy to fall into the trap of chasing someone else's version. However, the truest definition comes from defining success on your own terms, aligning it with your values, and pursuing a path that resonates with your unique desires and aspirations. Let's explore strategies to help you break free from external expectations and define success in a way that's deeply personal and meaningful for you.

Tip #1 - Reflect on Your Values and Priorities

Many times when we think of being successful, it's tied somehow into what we do for a living. Before we attempt to answer the question "what do we want to do?", we should take the time to ask ourselves the question "who do want to be?". The answer to who we want to be should reveal our core values and priorities. Understanding those core values and priorities can go a long way in being able personalize what success means to us. What matters most to you in life? Is it family, health, career, creativity, or something else entirely? Take some time to introspect and create a list of your top values. These values will serve as your compass in the journey to personal success.

Tip #2 - Set Meaningful Goals

Once you have a clear understanding of your values, set goals that align with them. These goals should reflect what success looks like to you. Whether it's achieving a certain level of fitness, starting your own business, or fostering deeper relationships, make sure your goals resonate with your values and aspirations

"Success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you do it." – Maya Angelou

Tip #3 - Embrace Failure as a Learning Opportunity

The pursuit of success isn't a linear journey, and the reality is that setbacks are part of the process. Instead of fearing failure, see it as an opportunity to learn and grow. The lessons learned from failure can provide us the clarity we need to redefine success as we continue to pursue it. When you redefine success on your own terms, you'll understand that it's not just about reaching a destination but also about the experiences and lessons gained along the way.

Tip #4 - Focus on Your Strengths

I'm a firm believer in the unique strengths and talents that each of us possess. Constantly measuring our ideas of success to others causes us to overlook the power of our own uniqueness. Take the time to identify what may naturally come easier for you as well as what you're passionate about. Success often comes more naturally when you leverage your strengths, talents and passions. By aligning your pursuits with your strengths, you'll be more likely to experience a sense of accomplishment and fulfillment.

Tip #5 - Practice Self-Compassion

It's often said that comparison is the thief of joy. Avoid self-criticism and comparison with others. Be kind to yourself throughout your journey to personal success. Understand that everyone's path is different, and it's okay to take detours or change direction if it leads to a more meaningful version of success for you.

Tip #6 - Cultivate Resilience

Resilience is the ability to bounce back from adversity. When defining success on a personal level, it's essential to develop resilience. Challenges and setbacks will come your way, but your ability to persevere and adapt will ultimately determine your success.

Success is not a one-size-fits-all concept. It's about finding fulfillment and happiness in your unique journey. Remember, your journey is yours alone, and your personal version of success is the one that matters most. As a coach, I want to assist you in redefining success on your own terms. Click on the link below for a free discovery call to get you started on your journey towards your success:

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